|Mellie the Chattel|
In some ways, Donny and Mellie remind me of Chuck and Di toward the end of their marriage. Both men show absolutely no regard for their wives, especially in public, both treated them abominably, and it's pretty clear neither wanted to endure their husband's touch. There's ample video of both couples. Every one remembers the polo non-kiss or the barely sheathed dagger-looks of the royals in Korea. But the shot of the the Trumps stepping from the plane, where he reaches for her hand and she shakes him off, was stellar. Or when they emerge from the limo at the White House where the HC Obamas are waiting, and Donny proceeds up the step before Mellie even gets out of the car. This is not a happy couple.
Should we care?
Yes, actually, we should.
I don't know much about Melania Trump. She doesn't come off as the sharpest spoon in the drawer. It could be her accent. It could be she's afraid of making a mistake. It could be that she's really terribly shy, although her modeling pictures tell another story. Or, it could be that she's in an abusive relationship and she is just plain terrified. Whatever it is, whatever the reason, Mellie should not be dismissed. Far from it: Mellie is a living, breathing metaphor for this presidency.
She is wife #3, and if the stories filtering out of Manhattan are true, she was about to be set aside for the mistress o'the moment who is supposedly ensconced somewhere in Trump Tower. Perhaps her name is Rapunzel? It's unimportant. Just as he bankrupted his marriages, he bankrupted his businesses. Just as he refused to fulfill contractual agreements with his contractors, we should not hold our breath about him fulfilling his election promises to We, the People. But did we really think that might ever happen? Probably not.
Melania bore him a male child. His manhood is once again satisfied...for a moment. But even a male child isn't enough penis for Donny. He told the Washington Post:
Being a great president has to do with a lot of things, but one of them is being a great cheerleader for the country. And we’re going to show the people as we build up our military, we’re going to display our military. That military may come marching down Pennsylvania Avenue. That military may be flying over New York City and Washington, D.C., for parades. I mean, we’re going to be showing our military.
If he shows up to review the parade in a military costume/uniform, we are in deeper and more serious doo-doo that earlier suspected. Bigger guns mounted on bigger tanks? Yes, I know a cigar can just be a cigar...but these ain't cigars.
But back to Mellie the Metaphor. She's kept a prisoner in her side of Trump Tower. We've all heard how Ivanka will be "acting first lady." Is Mellie unable to fulfill that role? Or is someone afraid she will misstep? And if she does...what happens to her? We have no way of knowing the answer.
Everyone of us has known someone trapped in an abusive relationship. Deep in our hearts, every last one of us knows the signals. This is not a submissive in a contractual agreement. There is way too much visible rejection/revulsion from her, no adoration whatsoever.
Mellie is a hostage. She may have been complicit in her own hijacking, but she's clearly having buyer's remorse. As caring, compassionate women, we cannot allow Donny to use Mellie as his whipping post. We are joining together to fight for access to health care, access to education, access to loving, let us not abandon Mellie Trump. Let us shout encouragement to her wherever she is. Let us stand beside and behind her...and let her know we have her back.
Let her be our symbol for freedom. Here are the new rules:
- No picking on Mellie. She has enough on her plate just trying to maintain her composure.
- No picking on her kid, Barron. Bullying, cyber or otherwise. is evil.
- No matter what she says, remember she is being manipulated.
Donny practices on Mellie, therefore Mellie is the stand-in for us. But she is also in the room. Mellie can, when she feels she is safe, can be an ally. Let's give her that chance.
My heart goes out to Melania Trump. She has to see him naked with that dangling Tootsie Roll he believes is Excalibur. She gets to smell his morning breath. She has to actually talk to him. She doesn't have to be our hero, she is not. She doesn't have to be our object of derision, she should not. But she is, indeed, our metaphor.
Mellie is on the inside. She can decide she doesn't have to be alone in there. She should figure out she is part of this sisterhood. She should know that, if she really needs to, she can reach out, even to Michelle, and get support.
We stand with you, Mellie. You, of all people, are not alone. We, the People, the Sisterhood, the Women of the World...you know...the ones from Albany to Antarctica, the ones from Berkeley to Barcelona, the ones from Paris to Perth, the ones from Iraq to India to Indonesia, the ones from St. Paul to Singapore....We, the Women, are ready.
Some people might think I'm being sarcastic or trying to be funny. I am not. I am dead serious when I say we need to reach out to Melania and let her know she has choices to make, and she is not a political prisoner. But damning her because her husband is a misogynistic, narcissistic, sleeze-bag scum-ball, it doesn't mean he is an extension of her.
Let's choose life for Mellie. She deserves at least a shot.
Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week
The march is only the beginning.
Now, you need to embrace acitvism.