Yes, We have No Delusions; We Have No Delusions Today.

I was thinking about my dad today. Come to think of it, I've been thinking about him more than usual lately. Yeah, I miss him. I miss the snarky rejoinders, off-color jokes, and excruciatingly bad puns. There has been a dearth of lively riposte in my life of late. I can't lay all that blame on Dad; Ziggy owns a fair chunk with his poorly planned departure. But that's all in the past, and I'm here without their constant commentary.

What I was thinking about was how much I am not enjoying this election. I'm at a point where I don't wanna watch the news. I've stopped listening to the usual array of pundits. I can't even sit through REAL TIME with BILL MAHER these days. It's all so annoying. I've taken to reading books about stuff that has no relation to anything. 

c.1924

I'm reading The Romanov Empress (by C.W. Gortner) about Princess Dagmar of Denmark who became Tsarina Maria Feodorovna when she married Sasha, aka Alexander III. It's a novel, in the first person, but a very interesting take on a woman who stood at the center of the collapse of monarchical Europe. Her sister was married to Edward VII of the UK, her brother was king of Denmark. Her father was referred to as "The Father-in-Law of Europe." Anyway, she was also the mother of Nicholas II, the last Tsar. In other words, she lived through the worst any mother could experience, from losing babies to burying adult children, to hearing about the murder of her other children. She was her own Greek tragedy. But she was also an interesting tough old bird. 

I am fascinated by women in government, whether they are born into it, married into it, or elected into it. Women who are powerful have to work ten times harder than a man to get from point A to point B, never mind point Z. Histories written by men tend to dismiss or denigrate powerful women, and this tsarina is no different. You have to wade through a whole lotta opinionated men to get to the center of Maria Feodorovna's steel spine. For good or for bad, she went to bat for the people of Russia, pushing her father-in-law's original idea of a constitution and a participatory Duma. Didn't do her much good; she was an outlier and no one was interested in her opinions on state. Nursing and war relief? Sure. 

Women have been having the same discussions with their husbands about power since someone thought up the idea of a headman. Mrs. Headman probably didn't sit around combing mammoth hair into thread. In fact, I would venture to guess Mrs. Headman was a very active participant in the running of the village because unless the women were of a mind to cooperate, not much got done. I am certain that Henry II was at odds with Eleanor of Aquitaine because she told him in no uncertain terms to naff off. And I am equally certain that all those history king movies where the women sit placidly on the dais are totally bullshit. 

Which is why I don't understand why having a vagina precludes you from being elected to the highest office in this land. 

There is something so fundamentally wrong with American society when a woman who is supposed to be brilliant is part of a group that calls its women handmaids, and instructs them to be subservient to their husbands. People will point to Victorian England as a time when women were subservient and subdued...but hey, folks, Victoria had a rather productive uterus and she was Empress. Excuse me...men were falling over themselves taking direction from her. Queen Elizabeth doesn't seem to be suffering fools with any regularity, either. 

Ergo, the docile subservient woman is a myth promulgated by men who can't deal with women in general. (Which really makes me wonder about Melania.) Men who want that myth are not men; they are cowards. They are abusers. They are weak and fragile. They can't control stuff, so they blame strong women. Did you catch our Feckless Leader begging suburban white women to like him at a rally in Johnstown, Pennsylvania?

Suburban women, will you please like me? Please. Please.

 Listening to Kamala Harris at the VP debate was an enlightening experience for me. 

Her modulated toddler-teacher tone when saying, "Mr. Vice President, I'm speaking. Okay?" was so wonderfully maternal in the delivery of that line, that I figured the look on his face must be the one he gives Mother when she corrects him. He has no balls and Harris knew it. That line was so take no prisoners in the gentlest, most unassuming way of all.

When Kamala Harris has to use her patient toddler voice to silence Mike Pence, is it because she really thinks he's a child...or because she knows he is  afraid of the power of the vagina? Long have I believed that men like Pence and his moronic master are abusers of women not because women are weak, but because women can do one thing they cannot: 

give birth.

If these so-called Christian soldiers are supposed to be superior beings, partnering with their God as masculine heads of household all because they have a penis, why do they have to control women? Seriously, if they're so good at being masterminds, why is it necessary to belittle and humiliate women? Well, maybe it's not actually about the dingle. Maybe it's because once the dingle has done its thing, they're done. Women grow the babies. Women feed the babies. And ultimately women teach the babies. The man's role is ZERO in the extended game plan.

Stop to think about it for a moment. Wouldn't that be the perfect reason to oppose reproductive rights? That gives the vagina owner the ability to control life and non-life. In the end, that's just too scary for the weakling sex...and I don't mean women.

Feckless Leader grabs 'em by the pussy. Little Boy Pence calls his wife "Mother." Amy Coney Barrett's husband calls her his "handmaid." 

I cannot speak for other women out there, but I find it all rather creepy. 

And the really creepy part? Almost half this country thinks all of that is okay. 

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

14 days left until the election.

If you haven't cast your ballot already,

please do so as soon as you can.

Remember, only you can prevent 

forest fires. 

And sorry....I cannot help myself

Who Will Speak For The Voiceless?

I listened to Amy Coney Barrett's opening statement, and I came away with the sense I was listening to a 15-year old giving a report about the Supreme Court. This is the part where the theater director in me takes over, and I start thinking about casting issues. In a bunch of ways, she reminded me of Doogie Howser or Young Sheldon: both kids working above their age grade. Only this Doogie Howser wants to take away public health insurance without a replacement plan in sight. For a woman who insists she is pro-life, she writes decisions that are strictly pro-death. Her flat, expressionless voice shoots ice into the veins of those around her. There is something so scary about her that I don't even want to write about it. And I'm not talking about the Handmaid color of her dress or the mask. 

When I was a kid, there was a kid in my class from grade school through high school named Robert Lehman. He was above and beyond smarter than anyone else in school. He was our class valedictorian, he went on to Yale. He was a really nice guy. And when he spoke of important matters, he had a cadence to his voice that years later, I can still hear. It was a measured sound, a thoughtful sound, and, even when his dander was up, a gentle sound. Bobby talking about serious stuff meant you stopped and listened because otherwise you would be missing something important. You didn't have to agree with him, but you probably wanted to listen to his argument. You would learn something. 

There is something to be said for kiddie gravitas, but even more to be said for being the grown-up in the room with gravitas. One has to recognize one's own place, but even more crucial is to recognize one's limitations. The quote Bobby chose for his senior page is, perhaps, more important today than when he selected the poem by Alexander Pope (1688-1744):

A little learning is a dangerous thing ;

Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring :

There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,

And drinking largely sobers us again.

Fired at first sight with what the Muse imparts,

In fearless youth we tempt the heights of Arts ;

While from the bounded level of our mind

Short views we take, nor see the lengths behind,

But, more advanced, behold with strange surprise

New distant scenes of endless science rise !

So pleased at first the towering Alps we try,

Mount o’er the vales, and seem to tread the sky ;

The eternal snows appear already past,

And the first clouds and mountains seem the last ;

But those attained, we tremble to survey

The growing labours of the lengthened way ;

The increasing prospect tires our wandering eyes,

Hills peep o’er hills, and Alps on Alps arise !

That sound that I remember so well is the sound I wanna hear coming out of the mouths of people who wanna sit on the Big Bench. Whatever her qualifications, and I know this is gonna sound ageist, I want a mature, older human sitting in that chamber, one with extensive life experience, one who has seen and heard just about everything, and who understands that no two people, cases, decisions, or kids are alike; each requires deliberation and consideration. "I heard this kid...." is not life experience. It is not maturity born of presence. I don't care how brilliant, erudite, or level-headed she's supposed to be, she lacks the ability, based on her statements to the press and others, to really be an Everywoman to We, the People. 

I find that in terms of SCOTUS, I am possibly more conservative than most people might think. I believe that the Constitution is a valid framework, but I don't believe it should be permitted to be a stagnant document. We, the People, of 2020 are not the same We, the People of 1820 or even 1920. This country changes all the time, and the law must address those changes. Just as Clarence "The Clown" Thomas's marriage would be invalid in most states before 1967, civil rights must also address gender identity norms that have become fluid. Notorious RBG was a champion for civil rights for all citizens in this nation. The person that succeeds (not replaces) her must be a champion for those who have been denied voices for so long. The originalism that Coney Barrett flouts is unrealistic and sets the stage for discriminatory behavior. I do not believe she will serve ALL the people. And I have a problem with that. 

In keeping with the waning hours of October 12th,  I want to take a moment to recognize the State of Minnesota for its ongoing work to honor the IP roots of this place. Bde Maka Ska is what everyone calls that lake now. The confluence of the two rivers is now correctly Bdote Minisota. 

It's more than a lake; this is Ziggy's high school as well as both the Senior and Junior Sons: Henry Sibley High School. First, they went after the school logo...long overdue. The "Indian" Warrior was replaced with a stylized generic warrior. But that matter of Henry himself remained. Ziggy woulda signed off on that change in a heartbeat. My late MIL, a historian and high school teacher, felt the school should never have been named for him in the first place. When it came to the local population of the area he was to govern, he was positively evil and ruthless. 

You can read about him here: Henry Sibley, 'pretty bad guy,' may lose his namesake high school 

The Indigenous Peoples of North America are still battling for their own civil rights. Ever hear anyone talk about reparations for them?  Ever hear of the Indian Civil Rights Act  of 1968?

With the law of the Indian Civil Rights Act (ICRA) at the time, also called the Indian Bill of Rights, the indigenous people were guaranteed many civil rights they had been fighting for.^[10] The ICRA supports the following:^[11]

• Right to free speech, press, and assembly
• Protection from unreasonable invasion of homes
• Right of criminal defendant to a speedy trial, to be advised of the charges, and to confront any adverse witnesses
• Right to hire an attorney in a criminal case
• Protection against self incrimination
• Protection against cruel and unusual punishment, excessive bail, incarceration of more than one year and/or a fine in excess of $5,000 for any one offense
• Protection from double jeopardy or ex post facto laws
• Right to a jury trial for offenses punishable by imprisonment
• Equal law protection due process

Land sovereignty, hunting, fishing, and voting rights, along with access to education and health care remain unresolved, ongoing issues, especially for those who continue to live on the reservations in Minnesota and elsewhere. And don't go saying casinos fixed all that...they did not. IP gambling has helped even the playing fields in some places, but not all. The quest for BASIC civil rights remains a struggle. 

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

In this state, we do not observe Columbus day, 

we observe Indigenous Peoples Day,

a small, but significant, step.

Cynicism and Amorality.

Fred Hiat, Editorial page editor of The Washington Post published an op/ed piece on Sunday afternoon. It opened with the following lines: 

There is never a silver lining to somebody else’s illness, but you might have thought that President Trump’s infection at least could have offered a learning moment for his supporters. 

If so, you would have underestimated the cynicism and amorality of the Trump campaign.   

This was written before the late afternoon joyride to wave at his loyal subjects amassed without masks (for the most part) outside the hospital grounds. 

Then came the news that he came to Minnesota already showing symptoms, and ignored our own mask mandates. It's interesting to note that three most loyal members of the idiot alliance were on the plane with him, also without masks. Why would he want to run the risk of infecting his slavish supporters? I can think of 2 reasons, the anthropological and the practical. 

There have been narcissistic leaders since the birth of clan living. Everyone has run across some person who thinks he/she knows better than anyone else how to run a clan/town/city/county/country/planet. There are some cases where that person can do a pretty good job. Sometimes, like Napoleon, they start out doing a pretty good job until the God complex kicks in. This is not news. Egyptians, Romans, Peruvians, and Japanese all, at one point or another, worshipped their various rulers as deities or demigods. One would hope we have come a long way since those days, although there are still groups who continue to consider sovereigns to be appointed by G-d. Sure. When we get to modern narcissistic leaders, we have a better sense of how they got to that elevated place because, basically, the printing press (read that as all media) pretty much leaves a paper trail of their history. What never ceases to amaze me is how the liars and clowns manage to get into power in the first place. 

Liars and clowns trade on fear. It's their best weapon. They want you to believe there is a boggart* out there waiting to get you. This scary thing can be a group, a philosophy, or a person. Doesn't much matter what it is. The liars and clowns pound on this is as functionally scare-able; they continue their rhetoric as if the boggart is real and the inability to see it makes that person an imbecile. It's an easy way to divide a community or nation, an easy wedge to pound on once there is a small cadre of true believers. My favorite example is ANTIFA. Feckless keeps talking about it as though it was a name of an organization. Interestingly, he insists that anti-Fascists are to be feared, when, in fact, this entire nation was built on anti-fascism and we fought wars against fascists. But Feckless Leader says anti-fascism is unAmerican. Hmmmm. 

Now there is a segment of the population that subscribes to these untruths, along with a number of others like Joe Biden wants to defund the police and universal health care is socialist. (Ummm, what would one call Medicare?) There is a disconnect between what is real and what is not; that line is increasingly blurred as Feckless Leader keeps hammering on the nonsense.  The bigger the lie, the more people believe it.He carries on as though he were, indeed, invincible, attending functions after it was clear...according to reports...that he was ill. He is airlifted to Walter Reed out of an "abundance of caution," and sent videos and texts showing he is still in control, still working, and obviously not bothered by COVID because, after all, he has special access to his super-meds....in which he has a financial stake.Obviously, this obese, outta shape, junk-food devouring cult figure is immune to the effects of the disease thereby becoming a self-proclaimed Übermensch.

And for the practical part?  Well, practical if you are a supportive of this brainless narcissist. 

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

I will be leaving the great Walter Reed Medical Center today at 6:30 P.M. Feeling really good! Don’t be afraid of Covid. Don’t let it dominate your life. We have developed, under the Trump Administration, some really great drugs & knowledge. I feel better than I did 20 years ago

Don't be afraid of Covid ? 

At this writing, over TWO HUNDRED AND TEN THOUSAND AMERICANS ARE DEAD and we shouldn't be afraid of COVID-19? What's next? He's gonna lay hands???????

For the record, as I write this, he just got off Marine-One, walked into the White House into a crowd and removed his mask, even though the White House is already declared a hot zone. EVEN if he is already infected, he is highly contagious. He has to be the driving part of this story, tailored to his fantasy world, showing him as some kind of Übermensch. 

Never mind the campaign...this highlights the cynicism and amorality of Feckless Leader...

Which brings me to part 2: he is not infected with COVID-19, he never was infected, but with a little luck, maybe he will be infected....but he's not infected now.

The Twilight Zone doctor briefing on Saturday should've set off every bell and whistle in the known universe. They couldn't even decide on how to describe his version of the illness. If his blood ox was down, maybe it was because his sphincter was cutting off the air flow. That would certainly be a more plausible excuse. The Doctor Clownie show said they were giving him dexamethasone....really? Are they serious? That's for people who are seriously ill. Side-effects make it contra-indicated for less-than-severe cases. 

Then he demands to go home and they send him home. As soon as he gets off the chopper and walks into the crowd waiting for him, he removes his mask. FUCK the people that are standing there! He is inviting them to become infected by him IF he is actually infected. Which should be one more sign he is not infected. Add to that the White House announcement that they are not following the protocols for contact tracing. This has moved far beyond absurd; it is downright dangerous.

Do you get some kind of bragging rights if you get COVID-19 from Feckless Leader? Is this like being the king's mistress? If you get herpes or chlamydia from the royal dick, is it still a serious disease? Ya, sure, you betcha. 

When the chopper ride didn't give him the sympathy boost he wanted, he went for the dread-er disease version, followed by the hand-waving joy ride around Walter Reed. That didn't do much for him either, so he went for videos and tweeting. This is the epitome of fake news. 

This is Feckless Leader's version of, "I don't feel good; I don't wanna go to school today," that same excuse he probably used when he didn't wanna take a test or do a report. You know what I mean...kinda like bone spurs. 

Two specific items come to mind. The first is exactly what everyone thinks: after the Cleveland debacle, it should come as no surprise that he doesn't wanna get on the stage with Vice President Biden. He made an unmitigated ass out of himself...compounded by his own ridiculous assertions that he won the debate. Really? Maybe on Twilight Zone planet, but sure as hell not on this one. 

The second is more devious: the confirmation of the Handmaid Coney Barrett as Justice. The fake illness, like every other whacko thing this guy does, is a red herring. It's to divert attention from Amy Coney Barrett. IF the White House is a hot spot, and IF he is working on spreading, not controlling the virus, infecting the rest of the government is a sure-fire way to delay elections. IF the focus is taken off the confirmation of the new justice and she gets in, she will be the pivot vote in overturning the election. 

You think I'm kidding? I am not. These things don't happen by chance, not with guys like Stephen "that shonda" Miller in the background. None of this is arbitrary. These guys are pros; they know exactly what they are doing and they are counting on the rest of us setting our hair on fire.

The next 30 days require cold calculation on our part. I'm not convinced anything will save this election, or get that fat-assed orange outta the White House.  Vote. Drive people to vote. Drive people to drop off their ballots in person. But sulking this one out is not a viable option...at least not if you want to have a democracy at the end of this ordeal.

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

The difference between Donald Trump and G-d?

G-d does not believe She is Donald Trump.

NOTE:

*BOGGART: it occurred to me that bogeyman or boogey-man may be construed as racist even though neither actually is. Turns out J.K.Rowling used a real word to describe the scary thing in the closet. A BOGGART is an old English word for a malevolent spirit or goblin-like creature. 

Let The New Year Begin: Only Good Things

Yom Kippur 5781 has zoomed into history. The impact of communal repentance while separated by a pandemic will be with us for years to come. The experience was different (that's a Minnesota different) with pluses and minuses: the Senior Son was "present" from Milwaukee, with my video off, I could move when I got shpilkes and still daven, machzor in hand. On the negative side, some of the ambient noise during sensitive parts of the liturgy (especially Yizkor, the memorial service)was disconcerting at best, exceptionally annoying at times. Of course, Ziggy still isn't there to scratch my back when I get an itch, or lend me a shoulder when I'm yawning. But that's an ongoing complaint.

If you're unfamiliar with Yom Kippur, there's a Wiki link for that. It's not the simplest holiday on the planet to explain; it's deeply rooted in the Jewish philosophy of what constitutes repentance. And when we confess out sins, it's as a community, not as an individual, everyone is included. Which, when you think about it, is an awesome responsibility. But it also means admitting to oneself where one failed, and how one can do better. 

The best thing YK gave me this year was 26 hours out of the news cycle. For that small amount of time, I occasionally wondered what was happening, but I didn't care enough to turn on the television, not even when I woke up...and CBS Morning News "Your World In  90 Seconds" is usually the first thing I see before I pop into my study for morning minyan. Part of me would like to extend that little bubble for a few days, but alas, I have a blog to write tonight...even if all day was the most solemn day of the year. 

Another thing about Yom Kippur is the required self-assessment. There was a lot to review from this year, most of which contributed to my decision to retire ahead of schedule. At the same time, I had an entire new life begin back in March, and I am still trying to figure out the finer details of being a person of some leisure....quarantine not withstanding. This alone makes year-in-review an interesting challenge.

Screech

To you, my gentle readers, I will try to write better episodes, and to keep my temper and tin-foil hat in place when the bull-hockey flies. That'll be hard, but I'm gonna try. I won't give up my soap-boxes, but I will try to screech less.  [Screech. There's a name I haven't heard in a while. Thank you, Zayde.] 

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

 Joe Biden should've agreed to the urine test with the following disclaimer: 

Can't say I expected anything less ridiculous from a piss-ant wanna-be dictator. But sure, I'll take a urine test. You first.

 

RBG: May Your Memory Be For A Revolution

Notorious RBG 

1933~2020

Fight for the things you care about, but do it in a way the will lead others to join you.  RBG

We got the news just after the Senior Son and Mrs. Senior Son were signing off their zoom-in for Rosh HaShana kiddush and motzi with the family. I heard my IM-ding and glanced at the message. The breath was sucked right out of me. How could I say the words? How could I tell anyone? How could this possibly be true on Erev Rosh Ha'Shana? 

I've been making a Mi Shaberach for Ita Ruchel bat Tzelia Leah every morning at minyan for the last few years. I heard her interviewed right after one of the cancer bouts, and when asked about people praying for her, she chuckled and said, "Ita Ruchal bat Tzelia Leah...some people will ask." I began the next morning. 

I never met Justice Ginsburg, but I started reading some of her decisions (I love her writing style) and was ecstatic when she was named to SCOTUS. Ziggy and I actually celebrated. We thought it was the best nomination ever, and she was overwhelmingly approved. We couldn't wait to hear her first dissenting opinion. We were fans from the get-go.

Then there is the matter of my RBG sweatshirt collection. This has been going on for a while. I guess everyone knows I am a long time devotee of Justice Ginsberg. As her fame grew, so did the images that began appearing. It started with Notorious RBG, which, according to all reports, she loved. She was named as a patronus...and I adopted her as my own because, after all, I would want her to be the guardian between me and the Dementors running this administration. Who could blame me for wanting to stand against evil with her? In real life, she was the guardian for so many people and institutions.  

She was a Life Member of Hadassah. So am I. So is Mrs. Junior Son. Hadassah isn't a Jewish joke punch line; Hadassah is an organization dedicated to social service around the globe. Justice Ginsburg routinely met with the Hadassah Attorney's Council when they were sworn in at the Supreme Court. From Hadassah's obituary for Justice Ginsburg:

...she repeatedly credited Hadassah founder Henrietta Szold as being an inspiration to her, one of "the two Jewish women, raised in the United States of America, whose humanity and bravery inspired me" and who she credits for being a "Zionist even before Theodor Herzl came on the scene."

At her core, she was quintessentially Jewish. A few weeks ago, I wrote about Kenosha and used this for the tip o'the day:

צדק, צדק, תרדוף

Tzedek, tzedek tirdof

Justice, justice shall you pursue. 

(Deuteronomy 16:20) 

Justice Ginsburg had this same pasuk hanging on the wall in her Supreme Court office. "The demand for justice runs through the entirety of Jewish history and tradition," she said more than once. Although her personal religious observance was forever altered when, as a girl, she was forbidden to say kaddish for her mother because there were not ten men present for a minyan (prayer quorum), her commitment to Jewish values remained steadfast. Still she considered getting the court not to sit on the first day of Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur, with the help of Justice Breyer, one of her "big achievements." On one scale, that might seem small...but if you are Jewish, that is huge.

And that's what made her such an icon. She saw the big picture. Justice Ginsburg wasn't out there just for women's equal rights under the law...she was out there for gender equity. She understood at her very core the need to take apart patriarchy in order to secure gender equity for all. This is not how many of us see equal rights; we see it as a women's issue when, in fact, it is a gender issue that requires scrutiny. Ruth Bader Ginsburg led the way by tackling cases where men were denied because they were men. (The movie case, Moritz v. Commissioner of Internal Revenue was selected because it blended both personal and political intersection.) By stepping away from the normative process, Ginsburg the lawyer was able to see past the obvious in order to rearrange the depth of an issue so it became universal. That was the truly brilliant part. Her ability to present that every-person aspect of gender equity changed everything. 

Her appointment to SCOTUS was not a great surprise to many, but her renown as a jurist and champion of human rights grew exponentially once she had the fringe. (We'll talk about that in a moment.) She became an icon, a role model to be emulated by girls, a reminder to stay in the fight for people fighting for their rights, and a great source of sage advice for all Americans. 

Let's talk about dissents for a moment. I heard someone on the idiotbox refer to Justice Ginsburg as cantankerous. I must dissent from that opinion. She wasn't mean-spirited or arbitrarily harsh, rather she was intent on getting the opposing viewpoint on the record. She was good at that. Justice Ginsburg has written some scathingly brilliant dissents. And her rationale for composing eloquent dissent opinions is spot on:

"Dissents speak to a future age. It's not simply to say, 'My colleagues are wrong and I would do it this way.' But the greatest dissents do become court opinions and gradually over time their views become the dominant view. So that's the dissenter's hope: that they are writing not for today, but for tomorrow."

And not to be forgotten, one must write a bit about the humor of Justice Ginsburg. She was a fashionable lady. Her court clothes were always impeccable. But it was her love of the collar that got everyone going. Since there isn't a whole lotta wiggle room in designer judicial robes, Justice Ginsburg loved giving her audience a soupçon of what she was thinking or what was coming down the pike. And she did it in a way that became her trademark: the collar. She had a brilliant collection, each one with its own meaning, the most famous of which is the Dissent Collar. 

It was Banana Republic swag. It was in a swag bag at an event. I love it:

For years, Ruth Bader Ginsburg has used one accessory to channel her disapproval: a Banana Republic bib necklace, affectionately known as her "dissent collar."

The Supreme Court Justice has imbued multiple jabots with meaning, from her crocheted "majority opinion" collar to her favorite lace look. But it's the dissent collar that's garnered the biggest following—perhaps because RBG fans love to see their feminist Justice take a stand, even if she can't do so out loud.  

The now-famous necklace reportedly came into Ginsburg's possession through Glamour's "Woman of the Year" event in 2012, when it was placed in swag bags. And why did she choose it to show her disagreement? Ginsburg explained to Katie Couric that she chose it as her dissent collar because, quite simply, "it looks fitting for dissents."

The Justice is known to wear the necklace when the Supreme Court announces a decision she's against, but she's also donned it on other occasions—such as the day after Donald Trump's election in 2016.

I have Dissent earrings from Mr. and Mrs. Senior Son, and a Dissent pin from Ruthie, my coworker, who also gave me my RBG action figure. I guess this is my version of Star Wars figures or American Girl dolls. Except this is a real person who did real things in the real world that have had a tremendous impact on all of us, men and women alike. 

She fought for our right to control our own bodies, to marry the person we love, to get credit and loans in our own names, and to be treated equitably in the workplace. Her causes could be reduced to a single idea: Tikkun Olam. A while back, she was asked how she would like to be remembered, and Justice Ginsburg replied:

...as someone who used whatever talent she had to do her work to the very best of her ability. And to help repair tears in her society, to make things a little better through the use of whatever ability she has.

She accomplished what she set out to do, but I am certain there is lots left undone for us to take up where she left off.  The work doesn't stop because she isn't sitting there on the bench. It goes on. We must go on. 

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

Joan Ruth "Kiki" Ginsburg, you will be missed for so many reasons. 

Your memory will not simply be for a blessing; your memory must be for a revolution. 

Fearless Girl faces the NY Stock Exchange.
The collar is perfect. 

L'Shana Tova 5781

According to Google Maps, it is exactly 1 mile from our house on Beckman Drive to Temple Beth-EL (z"l) on Bellmore  Road. A mile sounded  like a long  walk when I was a kid, but it really wasn't. We didn't walk on Shabbat, but we did on the High Holy Days of Rosh HaShannah and Yom Kippur. I've written about this before, so I won't repeat the warning about new shoes. 

According to Google Maps, we were exactly 3 miles from  shul. I rarely walked even on the High Holy Days, but the kids occasionally did. But  now, in this house, I am back to 1 mile from shul, and on occasion,I walk. I've even walked with my brother one year. But this year, my brother isn't coming here because, the wise fellow he is, he is not getting on a plane  and frankly, I don't blame him. Services are via Zoom, and he will join from his home in Pennsylvania. I even sent him a Machzor so he can feel like it's almost regular. Which it is not. The only walking to shul I'll be doing is from one room in my house to another. 

I am not looking forward to the Yamim Nora'im, the Days of Awe, as they are often called. My heart, not to mention my brain, isn't engaged yet. I am going through all my usual prep for the holy days, but it seems empty, as though the confrontation with my past year has already been sucked out of me. 

Suddenly deciding to retire last March, followed by 4 glorious weeks of self-quarantine so I could be the nanny for a few weeks, was a rather intense but abstract period of transition for me. I did a lot of thinking during those weeks, trying to figure out who I was versus who I wanted to be going forward. I had lots of questions for myself: some I could answer; others I had to think about for a while. So I did.

But now, as Rosh HaShannah is rapidly approaching, I find I am asking myself the usual end o'year questions like what could I have done better? Who did I piss off and need to apologize to?  Was there anything that I did that made me disappointed in myself or my reactions?  None of these are easy questions for anyone to answer, but they must be answered honestly.

I suspect I am one of the few who did not mind the lockdown or isolation. I think I needed the time to be quiet both inside and out. (Okay, peeps...stop laughing....I hear you from here.) And I think there has been a marked change in me...or at least some people tell me I am very different from the person they knew before March 20th, 2020. Part of me doesn't feel any different, but another part feels like an entirely different person. I think I'm okay with that. Whatever the genesis, I am thankful for the time alone. 

Although the kiddos will be here for First Night/Shabbat dinner on Friday, I imagine I will be davening alone on Rosh HaShannah. I struggle with the question where to daven. I still attend morning minyan almost every day...but instead of popping over to shul, I am at my desk. But I want something different for Rosh HaShannah. Do I take the laptop outside and daven on the mirpeset (little deck) or do I bring the spare Mac down and daven in the dining room? I need to make this different, even though it is so different I can't stand it. 

How we all adapt to the new reality is a test of strength and character. Every adaptation will be different. Each person will have to find a new comfort niche. Some may be more successful than others, and some may find a different level of comfort in the new process. In so many ways, this is like grieving...which we are all doing. No one can tell you how to grieve, just as no one can tell you how to find your own zone of kavanah. None of this is easy.

But maybe that has to be the point. Maybe the new discomfort will provide the impetus to grow? Setting aside beloved traditions will be hard; creating new ones will be interesting. We have no idea how long we will need those new ones, and whether or not they are permanent changes. We will all chafe a bit at the changes.

Maybe, it's like the shoes I wrote about in my first Rosh HaShannah post back in September of 2010, a decade ago:


 

When I was a kid, the High Holidays always meant a couple of new dresses and a pair of shoes that were never broken-in enough for the mile walk to shul. The first day of the holiday was synonymous with heel blisters. Despite that, I really loved the walk, though. I loved to stop on the bridge over the parkway and count cars with my dad and brother. It was as much a part of the ritual of Rosh HaShannah as the sneezing from the goldenrod that grew everywhere. You walked with your family, even if your best friend’s family was walking 10 feet ahead of you, and somehow, you didn’t mind so much.   


This year, the new discomfort for many of us will be walking alone...from the bedroom to whatever room we will sit in to pray as a Zoom Community. On the walk, however brief, we all remember what the old way was like...and we will tentatively embrace the new way because that's all we have at the moment. 

And who knows? Maybe we will all grow a little wiser for the experience. 

Wishing those who observe a L'shana tova u'metuka....may you have a sweet New Year. 

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

Buy local honey for dipping.

Honey grown in your area is good for what ails you.

Losers As Far As the Eye Can See

FIL is buried at Fort Snelling National Cemetery right next to Minneapolis-St. Paul Airport. It's a big place; you need a map to find your way around. Although I now know without looking where FIL is to be found, the map remains in my glove box, along with an attached note telling me where the gathering place was for his brief but spectacular funeral. Just in case.

But I don't get lost because I am already a loser. And I am not alone. 

I have never been alone at Fort Snelling. There are always losers everywhere you look. I don't mean the men and women beneath the white headstones. I mean the real losers....the ones who are there, heads bowed, because they have lost someone. I stand with those losers because I have lost all my veterans. I can still hear their voices in my head on appropriate occasions. But every single one of them, if you had the great good fortune to know them, would happily tell you what was in it for them when they served their country in uniform. Without exception, they would all tell you it wasn't about them; it was about this country.

I don't think any of them would recognize this America.

Feckless leader says he respects the military and would never say anything bad about them. Au contraire, Monsieur President. Here's a small sample of how he respects our men and women in uniform:

• ON August 2, 2016, Feckless accepted a Purple Heart from a fan at one of his rallies and said: “I always wanted to get the Purple Heart. This was much easier.” [My personal favorite]
• On July 20, 2017, in room 2E924 of the Pentagon, Feckless Leader told a room full of Generals, "You’re a bunch of dopes and babies"
• Feckless urged Florida to not count deployed military votes (Nov 12, 2018)
• On July 31, 2019, Feckless ordered the military to punish the prosecutors who participated in the war crimes trial against Edward Gallagher
• On Aug 2, 2019, Feckless Leader requisitioned military retirement funds towards border wall
• ⁠In May 2020, the White House ended National Guard deployments for Corona Virus response one day before they could claim benefits.

These are fine examples of how to honor those who devote their lives to the preservation of our nation, dontacha think?

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

The Washington Post is one of my go-to news sources, but lately, I don't wanna go there. The paid ads are all for an America I do not recognize. They are non-stop lies that have been debunked repeatedly by fact-checkers world wide, yet the Wash Po accepts those adverts and runs these videos of dystopian disinformation. Same adverts run ad nauseum during the local news.

If you run an ad claiming your pillow cured cancer, no TV station in American would run it because it's bullshit. Yet when a political party puts up an ad that accuses a political rival of acts that just NEVER happened, it's okay. 

How is that okay? 

We're not talking about spin here. We're talking about vetted, disproven, debunked lies. Would you teach your kid that it's okay to lie so long as someone believes him/her?

This is broken. 

I not talking about censorship here; I'm talking about truth in advertising. I am not suggesting that political ads be banned...although I confess, that sounds pretty good to me, but when an advert can be PROVEN to contain falsehoods and disinformation, the media should have the right to refuse to run it. 

This applies to both parties. 

When I see the ads being run by the RNC, I see terror because that's what they want me to see. They talk about Biden's America v. Trump's America....but I don't understand that parallel at all. 

Under the Obama/Biden administration, the economy was pulled back from the precipice, employment rose steadily, crime was generally, down, and while there were certainly long overdue racial issues rising rapidly to the surface, the general sense was not civil war approaching. A potential pandemic was even averted. 

Feckless Leader has been president for three years, long enough for us to get a taste of "Trump's America," and it ain't nuthin' to brag about. His lies are documented by fact checkers on the right and left of center. The pandemic didn't just go away with the warmer weather as he promised. As of tonight (September 7th) there are 189,000 deaths reported. The economy for about 98% of Americans is in shambles. Thousands of businesses have shuttered permanently due to the pandemic, and millions of people are on the cusp of losing their homes through eviction. 

While we're at it, most of the people who have lost jobs have also lost employer-based health insurance making accessible care a fantasy.

Our stable genius president thinks he can fix this by permanently ending payroll taxes. He thinks that money will find its way into workers' pockets. Yeah, right. 

Okay, let me ask you a question: can you afford to retire if there is no Social Security income?

Now that I've scared you, I'll stop now.

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Day

  From Pirke Avot - Ethics of the Fathers

(circa 200 C.E)

Chapter 2, Mishna 3 

Watch out for the government:

they befriend a person to meet their own needs,

appearing friendly when it is to their benefit; 

but they do not stand by a person 

when that person is in distress.

Ya think?