Down the Rabbit Hole

This has been a busy week on a whole lotta levels. I learned about stuff I didn't know. Some of it good, some of it not so good, but nothing earth shattering. In between trying to learn how to operate the new car....and I do set a few minutes aside every morning to learn another function... but you still need an engineering degree ...and thinking about war (yeah, I know) I've also had to examine and re-examine some of my previously held-dear concepts. 

First, let's talk cars. I finally got the full accident report on the Rogue and holey buckets! there was one heck of a surprise in there. Big-ass-truck driver was drunk. Yep. Six o'clock on a Saturday evening and he blew a .15 on the ol' breathalyzer. Officially drunk in Minnesota is .08. I guess I didn't get close enough to him that night, but apparently he had serious booze-breath because he was "alcohol suspected" on the form. Now I know why he was so freaked out. I have been hit by a drunk before, so I'm not a fan of the drink'n'drive club since that last one almost took out my then 4-year old son. Thank G-d I was in the Volvo that day. 

I also learned about Pearl Harbor this week. I mean, long ago I learned the big chunks, but I never paid much attention to the numbers. It was, after all, WWII and lots of people died in that war. But I went down a research rabbit hole on this one. The official death toll at Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941 was 2,403 and that was military and civilian deaths. There had been no declaration of war prior to December 7th. In fact, the declaration of war from Japan came about two days after the attack. Ergo, we were not at war with Japan even though there were tensions over Japanese expansion into China and restrictions of trade between Japan and the US. Then I thought about Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Between 110,000 and 210,000 died from the atom bombs dropped on those cities. They can't be sure of the number because so many people were incinerated. 

After reading about the lead up to Pearl Harbor and the aftermath of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, I came to the only conclusion there was: if you start a war, people will die. It's really just that simple. The bombing probably saved millions of lives: Japanese, Asian, and others. It might've been done with one, not two bombs, but in the end, it stopped the war...and that saved lives...especially in Japan. No, it wasn't humanitarian...it was efficient. In war efficiency used to count. And if it stopped the killing, so be it. 

War, however, is never really simple. There are two or more sides. Both sides will skew numbers to their benefit. Both sides think only stupid people cannot see the truth...their version of the truth, at least. And sometimes history set in stone is treated as propaganda, facts are dismissed as convenient fiction, and people on both sides still die. And people will lie forever about the causes. I mean, even Niki Haley didn't think the Civil War was about slavery yet a whole lotta people died for that one. But I digress. 

This brought me around to thinking about death. 

This month is Adar Alef. This year, there's also an Adar Bet. See, the Hebrew calendar doesn't have a leap day, it has a leap month. Okay, try wrapping your head around this: 

A leap year in the Jewish calendar has 13 months and occurs 7 times in a 19-year cycle. In Hebrew, a leap year is referred to as Shanah Me'uberet, or pregnant year.

L to R: Budge, Dave, Mom 

And I have no idea how this works mathematically, nor do I wanna know. What I do know is that Adar, whether it's Alef or just plain Adar, begins the spring yahrzeit parade for me....Grandma Sarah first, then my mom, then my Uncle Dave, then my MIL, then Grandpa Moishe, then Uncle Budge, and finally, Ziggy. There are more yahrzeits than you can shake a stick at...or put a rock on a grave. Whatever. It's a tough time for me and my thoughts do turn to my own demise. Did I do a good enough job for the kids? Did I do right by the old folks? Am I leaving anything undone? What would Mom have done? What can I still fix? 

Ah, there she is: the fixer. I want to kiss all the booboos and make them go away. I want to smooth all the paths. I want everyone to love each other and play nice. The truth is, I cannot do that. No one can. But somehow I manage to periodically beat myself up for things I coulda, woulda, shoulda. When I stand at the edge of that particular rabbit hole, I now know enough to force myself back from the edge. A couple of weeks ago, I caught myself wanting to fix something that the conscious me knows can never be fixed because, frankly, it's not a me problem; I simply adopted it because it needed to be fixed and I truly believed in kisses and band-aids. 

Which brings me back to, believe it or not, war. Honestly, it must be the flawed end of human nature that makes us fight to the death. Since the very beginning, history has been nothing but a long line of hateful actions that end in war. And we all know if you start a war, people will die. Even the familial/interpersonal wars...those are death by a thousand slights...but pieces of one's heart die when the wars cannot be stopped.

That teeny tiny white speck is Israel

My heart is dying in pieces for my people, the Jewish people. We make up less than .2% of the world's population. Our traditional homeland, the place where we have continuously lived for over 4,000 years, is about 8,550 square miles, about the size of New Jersey. The Arab nations of North Africa and the Middle East are about 5,000,000 square miles. That means Israel takes up about .17% of the land. A veritable speck. Why do they want to throw us off so tiny a parcel? Is there something we could've done to prevent this...I mean short of marching into the sea? Can this be fixed and still have our home intact? I think every one of us asks that question every day.

Yet, every war that has been started against the modern State of Israel has been lost. Even when statehood was offered, it was refused because Hamas and its predecessors wanted all the land to be Judenrein...Jew free. Why do they hate us? Because. Abraham sent Ishmael away? Because we learned to be portable in exile? Because we have succeeded wherever we have gone without being permitted to own any land?

Or is it because we are a stiff-necked people who refuse to bow down to other versions of God because we have retained our identity as Jews? 

Folks, if you are so threatened by this tiny sliver of population on this tiny sliver of land, you have other problems that need fixing and shitting on us isn't gonna fix your issues. Stop wasting your time trying to kill us; we don't die. We reinvent and we survive. Jews playing the victim went out at the end of World War II. We no longer have any interest in placating your issues while dying in the process. Deal with yourself and your own shortcomings. Build yourselves an economy. We did it, and the civilized world wants to help you do it. Build industries, not tunnels. There. Isn't that easy?

In the end, all any of us want as Jews is to be left alone to be Jews in the place we've called home for 4,000 years. You want to share that space? Fabulous...do it respectfully and democratically. Work hard, play hard, send your kids to school, drink potable water and use the electricity. Serve in the government...you get a voice, you know. But understand this: Israel is Israel is Israel is Israel is Israel. It is our home and we're not leaving. 

Can you possibly grok that concept?  

The Wifely Person's Tip o'the Week

Still pushing to free Palestine?

Great idea! Free them from Hamas

because that's who's holding them back.